In Darkness there must always be Hope - KANERA
by chefke
Summary: Hera deals with the aftermath of DUME. Also Dave Filoni you suck. JK. no but really.


_Hera Syndulla is a Rebel leader during the time between Star Wars episode 3 and Star Wars Rogue one. These events take place directly before Star Wars Rogue One. Kanan Jarrus (Caleb Dume) was a Jedi padawan during Order 66. He was recruited by Hera on a planet called Gorse. Kanan later recruited orphan Ezra Miller on a planet named Lothal to be his padawan and trained him in the ways of the Force._

 _-C_

* * *

Hera collapsed into the pilot's seat, her head cradled in her hands. Her entire body was visibly shaking. She needed to lock the door and lose her carefully constructed control, but her hands were shaking too badly for the control panel to register her hand motion. She needed to fall apart but not where she could be seen. The rebellion needed to see strength, stability, and above all else, a united front. Now she was just like the many different fractured families and orphans the rebellion had taken in over the years.

She had always considered herself an orphan but losing her father, Ryloth, and her family made her feel alone in ways only an orphan could relate to. She had always wanted the people the rebellion took in to feel some semblance of normalcy. It was hard to provide that when the rebellion had no hope and only death. To the orphans, they had just traded one hardship for another. She had started this journey with the rebellion to prevent more orphans and to save the ones that they took in. To give the orphans they found a life and a family, some semblance of normalcy.

Who was she kidding?

A rarity was a rebel who was afforded the opportunity to be a child, to have a carefree childhood free of war and pain and death. How could they possibly pass on something they had never experienced or learned?

She had been conscripted by her parents before she was born to free her homeworld from Slavers and then from the Empire. Same problems different people. Once her mother had been killed it became an all out war and it was all she could do to not lose her humanity. Her father's tunnel vision in Free Ryloth had turned him dark and hollow. He didn't care if the rest of the Galaxy burned as long as Ryloth was free. His obsession ran so deep he barely noticed when his only daughter abandoned his precious Freedom Fighters militia.

Zeb had been raised into the military, to protect his homeworld from extinction. His world, like Kashyyyk had been targets to Slavers because of the people's physical strength. When the Republic fell the Empire went after Kashyyyk first before they turned their attention to Lasan. They fought bravely but they were no match for the heavy artillery that was sent to their homeworld. Their species was eradicated. Zeb had barely managed to escape and lived with the weight of his failure every time he opened his eyes.

While Sabine's people were never sold into slavery or victims of mass genocide, they were a proud people that were brought to their knees by the Empire. The Mandalorian System was built on Mandalore's blood rage and their species bloodlust for war. Only the deceased Duchess Satine Kryze had managed to create distance for the Mandalorian system known for their weapons and bloodshed and bring them closer to peace and non-violence. Her violent death by the Siths hands had been a traumatic blow to everyone supporting peace and transparency in the old republic during the clone wars.

The Empire had recognized what a potential danger Mandalorians were and preemptively tried to recruit children into their 'Academy' in hopes to create better weapons and soldiers. It had worked for the most part. Some of their greatest weapons were designed by Mandalorians, like Sabine. In her early teens Sabine had to cope with being the mind behind dangerous tech that the Empire used to kill innocent Mandalorians with. She had fled to the resistance with as much guilt as Zeb and even more bodies behind her.

Poor Ezra had a loving family on a small backwater planet. Most people in the galaxy didn't even know where Lothal was. His small happy family had been torn apart by the Empire because his parents had a strong levels of sympathy and good consciences. Because of that Ezra had grown up on the streets clawing for food and fighting everyday to survive through the night and into the next morning.

Kanan-

Tears began to leak from behind her clenched eyes and she stood violently knocking several things onto the ground. She pounded her fist into the door lock feature and sank to the floor finally allowing her tears to fall into gut wrenching sobs.

Kanan had his entire world taken from him. All he had ever wanted as a child was to serve and protect, like all those before him. After the Order was given for the Jedi's eradication he had hid. He had survived until a pretty twiilek had found him on Gorse. She had dragged him into this war and he-

Hera slammed her fists into the co-pilots seat, into his seat. The noise that came out of her mouth gave her chills up her spine. She kept hitting the seat as if that would bring the love of her life back to her. Why didn't she tell him she loved him earlier? He told her so often that he only got up because he saw her face next to his. He told her he loved her. He told her every day, several times a day.

But she was focused on the rebellion. Why was it so hard to say, 'I love you Kanan?' Four simple words. She continued to pound the chair her hands becoming wet and thick with blood from her dry and cracked knuckles. She screamed for Kanan, she cursed the soldiers in the AT-AT's that had killed him, and she cursed the Empire for taking the person she loved the most.

"Hera, you need to stop." Sabine was pulling her away from the seat and into her steel hard embrace. "He wouldn't want this Hera."

Hera tucked her head into Sabine's cold Mandalorian armor and sobbed. They took him from her. She had nothing. She had nothing and everything. She had an entire Rebellion to keep standing but she had no legs to stand on. She lost her strength, the reason she got up every day. She-

"Hera the test came back." Sabine's voice was quiet.

"No one knew about the test except me, you, and Kanan. Ezra can't tell the Empire anything." Hera's body shook. Not only had she lost Kanan but she had lost Ezra to the dark side. In fury over Kanan's death he had rushed a revenge mission a day later and had been taken captive. Two weeks later he resurfaced destroying the Phoenix squadron and killing Zeb during a supply run. The rebellion was retreating now with ships from Princess Leia but they all knew it was only a matter of time.

"I can't Sabine. I can't. I've lost too much. No more." Sabine tightened her hold on Hera and whispered firmly into her ear.

"Hera. You need to eat. It's not just about you anymore." Hera shook her head. She lost her strength when Ezra led the squadron that destroyed Free Ryloth's last ships. Her father given nothing more than a traitor's funeral of ashes in space and no crew to mourn his death.

"Hera. I know it's hard. I've found us an outer rim planet where we can hide and raise him right. He's all we have left of Kanan, of our Ghost family. You need to be strong so we don't lose him too." Hera looked into Sabine's shining eyes. Her once vibrant hair and armor was now devoid of any color or happiness. It was simple and utilitarian. They were clothes to help blend in and avoid detection.

"It's a boy?"

She nodded silently her grip firm around Hera. A plate of the last of their food laid discarded on the floor.

"And the gene… the midichlorians? Does he have it?" Her voice broke as her worst fears and fervent prayers fought each other for dominance.

Sabine's tears escaped her eyes and slid down her cheeks.

"I'm so sorry. Hera, he's force sensitive. They'll hunt him. They..." Whatever Sabine said was lost on Hera as she felt a odd calm settle over her. She felt as if she were suddenly floating, an odd sensation she had only once. On the worst day of her life.

She looked up to see the door slide open behind Sabine on it's own accord. There was no one there and Hera had an odd sense of knowing that there wouldn't be. She released a terrified Sabine and followed the broken hallway down to the crews quarters. The lights flickered in the hallway their circuitry having shortened out long ago in midst of a battle. With no Chopper to fix them they stayed nearly broken but not quite, like the crew on what was left of this ship.

She stopped in the hall of the crew's quarters as the door to Kanan's quarters hissed open. She stepped into the room and ignored the dark, Ryloth was a dark place growing up. She was used to it. The door closed behind her but it was still okay. She knew every inch of this room with her eyes closed. She bent her knees low and felt for the worn out mat on the floor. When Kanan lived on Gorse it had been his bed. On the Ghost, it had been his meditation mat.

The dark brown mat that only two week prior she had kissed him and made love to him on while he was attempting to meditate with the Force. He had smiled wryly at her advances and abandoned his meditation to spend time with the love of his life. Her fingers ran over the bare thread. She tried as hard as she could to smell him but his scent had been gone from this room long before his death. There was no time to sleep when the Empire was hunting you. Only vivid nightmares as you dozed off in your co-pilot's chair.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Her fingers gripped the mat as tightly as she could and she whispered his name.

"I know you're there." She whispered. "I can feel you."

"I don't know this path, Kanan. I don't know how to raise a Jedi, I barely know how to raise me. What do I do, Kanan? Show me the way." She opened her eyes when a tinkering noise came from under his bed. She pulled his one stuck drawer until it nudged open slightly. Just enough for a bright white light to shine through and illuminate the room. The drawer slid open easily and a clear and gold guilded square floated out from the drawer and hovered several inches off of the floor just below Hera's nose.

The corners moved and shifted until the box opened and a voice called out to her.

 _"This is Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. I regret to report that both our Jedi Order and the Republic have fallen, with the dark shadow of the Empire rising to take their place. This message is a warning and a reminder for any surviving Jedi: trust in the Force. Do not return to the Temple. That time has passed, and our future is uncertain. Avoid Coruscant. Avoid detection. Be secret... but be strong. We will each be challenged: our trust, our faith, our friendships. But we must persevere and, in time, I believe a new hope will emerge. May the Force be with you always."_

Hera placed a hand on her flight suit until she was sure she could feel the small pressure under her belly button. She massaged the growing mass gently.

"You hear that little Caleb? We will avoid the core worlds and detection from the Empire. We will be secret and we will be strong. We will trust him n the Force and we will wait. We will wait for a new hope."


End file.
